I’m calling bullshit
By Phil McAndrew [website | tumblr | twitter]
[h/t: tastefullyoffensive]
Source : tastefullyoffensive
I come alive in your espresso eyes

The first time I saw you
I knew it would never last
I’m not half what I wish I was
I’m so angry
I don’t think it’ll ever pass
And I was bad news for you just because
I never meant to hurt you
(via loveyourchaos)
Source : thistrulyisgodscountry
guys remember when Sam’s lunch fell in the trash
And I repaid Grace by gibing her a blowjob
pasdesolee said: Now I lay me down to sleep, I hope to God she wants the D
And if she does before I wake, I put the D next to her face
Source : westbor0baptistchurch
Source : methlabrador
why fall in love when you can fall asleep
(via davealgonquins)
Source : jakefromstate-farm
Source : mameshibakonatsu.blog82.fc2.com
You ever 69 someone for so long, you start to miss them?
My godfather’s best friend dated my mom when I was around five or six.
And he comes over a lot to my godparents’ house. He’s family, basically. And I don’t think it’s awkward when we say hi and hug and whatnot.
I just wonder if he knows that I know that my mom had an eptopic pregnancy with him.





